Wednesday, September 16, 2009

Now I can just breathe



Breathe. Breathe in. Breathe out. This is where I am today. Just settled back and breathing. Littles 3,4 & 5 are all settled in their school routines. Littlest Little #6 started Preschool 3 mornings a week yesterday and I have Wednesday mornings to myself. All of the fear and sadness I felt around Not-so-little #1's problems has been released and Not-so-little #2, well he's my easy child. I really like the feeling of being settled. I love the peace. This is NOT how I felt this time last year. There was no settled feeling, no peace and the only breathing I was doing was mostly hyperventilating.

My new found love of focused breathing has brought me through some highly emotional times these last few weeks. I call it my Spirit's voice. The sound of my breathe is the song that my spirit sings. It is the soft, motherly voice of encouragement and comfort. It is the life force of my truest self. If I don't breathe, I don't live. And I'm not talking about the physical need for breathing. I'm talking about the spiritual need for breathing.

My search for my truest self has been long and tedious. I searched and searched for years. Today I have the wisdom to know that I can't find myself through a book or through a therapist or a 12-step meeting. I can't find myself through Mr. Man or the Littles. I can't find myself from a community of like-minded people. These are all tools to aid me in keeping spiritually fit, but to truely find myself I need only breathe in and breathe out. I need only allow my breath to embrace me every moment of every day.

So as my time of solitude is drawing to a close and I need to go grocery shopping before I pick up the Littlest Little, I leave with this one thought.

Breathe in, breathe out....OH SNAP!!! I forgot to make a grocery list!!!!...Breathe in, breathe out.

Just my thoughts.

13 comments:

Sharmila said...

I love this post! Thanks for sharing! I feel much calmer after some emotional turbulence lately also! It's amazing how breathing can do so much - thank you for reminding me to 'just breathe'.,.. have a beautiful day! ~Sharmila

septembermom said...

This is a beautiful post to share. I really need to try this form of breathing to relax and center myself. I'm glad that the school year is starting off well for your kids.

Megan "JoyGirl!" Bord said...

Ha! That last part made me laugh. "Oh snap!"

What a beautiful thing to share with us, and actually to remind me of: the power of breathing. It's so invigorating, and truly spiritual, as you said. when I'm focused on my breath, I'm focused on my life. My real life - the moment of living - as opposed to what my head tries to convince me that life should or shouldn't be. In breath there is truth.

Ahhh, I feel better having read this post! Thank you, Jill.

Caroline said...

Breathing is good....

mermaid said...

'My search for my truest self has been long and tedious. I searched and searched for years. Today I have the wisdom to know that I can't find myself through a book or through a therapist or a 12-step meeting. I can't find myself through Mr. Man or the Littles. I can't find myself from a community of like-minded people. These are all tools to aid me in keeping spiritually fit, but to truely find myself I need only breathe in and breathe out. I need only allow my breath to embrace me every moment of every day.'

Perfect. Just perfect.

Christine said...

I truly love this post! I felt calmer just reading it. And with my hectic schedule lately it's a good reminder for me to stop and just breath as well. Thanks. :)

Lisis said...

Ha! I loved this! I was almost in a trance thinking about breathing in... breathing out... noticing my breath as I read... then, suddenly, "Oh, Snap!" and reality was back in there. Yup, gotta get groceries.

This reminds me of the Chopra book, First Enlightenment, then Laundry (or something like that). Fact is, it all has to fit within the context of our REAL lives.

Even if you go to an ashram to "find" yourself, what really matters is how you "keep" yourself once you re-enter your life. In that sense, Mr. Man, the Littles, and all the people you come in contact with (especially the difficult ones) are your best spiritual teachers.

Thanks for another GREAT post!!!

suZen said...

Marvelous post! It is in the stillness we come to really connect with ourselves and spirit. I've come to absolutely love solitude tho many of my peers suffer greatly from "empty nest syndrom" and are restless. I figure I waited LONG ENOUGH for this! I want to enjoy it! :)

Zeenat said...

My Shiny Jill,
I am breathing and breathing and breathing With you...cause your enrgy is just shining through. I love how you can just uplift me with every post you write.
Lots of love and hugs
Zeenat.

p.s. the oh SNAP...was awesome...me giggling ;)

Lori | JaneBeNimble said...

Hi Jill,
I felt a warm happy feeling when I came to your blog today (I'm a first-timer); it has a great look and feel!

Hey, Iove the breathing thing. The nice thing about breathing, is that there's a pretty good chance I'll be "let know" if I forget one of the steps (breathe in, breathe out...)

Low stress, low worry, just breathing. Ahh.... :)

Jan said...

Learning about the power of my own breath to uplift, restore, heal, center, bring me into the heart of God completely changed my life. I am so happy that you are finding breath practice to be a source of great comfort and joy....

Nina P. said...

Thank you for shinning your Light on me today. I love your thoughts here, they speak to me; heart and soul. The breath is the essence of life. You put it so eloquently here. Even the "Oh snap" moments lead back to the breath. May your breath always focus you, calm you, center you to the essence of your being, your core, your Light. Blessings to you and yours. Love and Light, Nina P

Tess The Bold Life said...

Jenn,
I've never thought of breathing as a spiritual thing. Thanks for the insight! Duh...

I love how you refer to your children as Littles...love it!