Monday, February 7, 2011

A letter of forgiveness to me


This is a painting I did of my Root Chakra.  I painted the Chakra on the trunk of a tree  The black spot in the center symbolizes the fear that I have been living with and this letter is meant to help release the grip that fear has on me once and for all. 

Dearest Beloved Jill,

I am writing this letter to you today in hopes that you can recieve the forgiveness that you deserve once and for all.  This letter is long overdue.  You don't deserve all of the shame and guilt and unhappiness that you have carried around for so long.  So here is what I need to say:

I forgive you, Jill, for being closed off emotionally as a child.  I forgive you for hating your life as a teen.  I forgive you for being irresponsible as a young adult and turning to alcohol, men and food for comfort.  I forgive you for letting yourself get pregnant as a young, single woman.  I forgive you for being emotionally distant from your young children and your other family members for many years.  I forgive you for being financially irresponsible as a single parent.  I forgive you for starting and quitting so many 'careers'.  I forgive you for spending so many years depressed more than not.  I forgive you for allowing your home to become a place of clutter and chaos.  I forgive you for burying fear so deep inside your body that it turned you into a shell of a person.  I forgive you for keeping your Spirit tied up and gagged for most of your adult life.  I forgive you for being fake and judgemental and hurtful.  I forgive you for doubting that you could ever deserve pure, unconditional Love.  I forgive you for withholding your thoughts and feelings, and looking to others to define them instead.  I forgive you for holding on to resentment and hate for yourself.  I forgive you for not taking care of your beautiful body, mind and spirit.  I forgive you for not forgiving yourself.

You deserve to Love yourself, trust yoursef and feel secure in knowing that you are just who you need to be.  A beautiful, vibrant and shining Spirit resides inside of you and she deserves to been seen, heard and felt all around you.  You, Jill, deserve this forgiveness. You have come a long way in this lifetime.  You have been on an amazing path to healing, but it has become obvious that you have been holding on to fear that you were missing an important stepping stone. So I extend my forgiveness to you and I wish for you a bright and shiny life.  May you always know how much I love you and wish the best for you.  You ARE good enough.  You ARE beautiful on the inside and the outside.  You WILL be surrounded in abundance of all things that make your Spirit shine.

Blessings of Love to you all the days of your life.

Me 

Just my thoughts

6 comments:

Angela Sweetland Bass said...

(((Jill))) I have tears, because I could have written those same words about myself. Beautiful.

Linda Myers said...

Me, too.

The Mother Freakin' Princess said...

Heartbreaking and Beautiful at the same time. We all deserve forgiveness...oxoxo

LauraX said...

How amazing is this? Your post then mine?

“I am a shining light, and my presence in the world adds beauty to all of existence. My essence is LOVE."

now take that for-giveness and give yourself compassion and unconditional LOVE.

gentle steps

mermaid said...

Jill, I forgive you for depriving yourself of this love and forgiveness. And I honor you for producing the long lost stepping stone from within.

Natalie Jean (Bottoms) Kelsey said...

Wow this is beautiful..I am teary too. I am soooo happy that you are letting your light shine. You are a child of god no lesser no more than any other child of the universe..it is your purpose to be :) shine shine shine beautiful sunshine. I too have done some of what you spoke of in my life..I still have my ups and downs but when I'm feeling down I envision a glowing radiant ball of light exploding it all away. :) peace