Tuesday, March 30, 2010
When Littles fight
I'm not saying that they don't have a right to be angry at each other. What I'm saying is that I don't know how to deal with the wall that they are putting up. As a mother, I want all of my Littles to love each other and be kind to each other. I know that fighting happens. Siblings don't get along ALL of the time. This rift between the 2 oldest isn't just a typical fight and I find myself desperately wanting to fix their relationship. I can not do this. They have to fix this together and at this point in time neither of them is going to take on that responsibility. I am frustrated with both of them. I also love both of them deeply and want them to be happy. I want them to feel loved and accepted for who they are. They may not be willing to extend that love and acceptance to one another, but I am able to give it to them. I am able to love them both without picking sides and adding to the drama.
I don't know if they can or will ever get past this anger. I know they can't do it today and so that leaves a bit of a hole in my heart. I won't give up hope that someday they will laugh together and love each other unconditionally.
My journey through motherhood has been one of many ups and downs. I readily admit that in the past there were probably more downs than ups. During those downs I did not like nor did I want to be a mom. My two oldest spent their early years with a depressed, emotionally distant and angry mother. I softened as they grew older, and since I have set my Spirit free I am able to Love fully and openly. With a free Spirit I am able to love being a mom during these times of conflict. Yes, there is some pain, but ultimately I know that all I can do is be an example of Love & Compassion. I will be a Warrior of Love for all of my Littles. Yes, I will get frustrated when they are acting unreasonable, but I will still let Light shine. I will still Love them for being exactly who they are at any given moment. I will not be drawn in to any battle, but I will also not push them away.
Just my thoughts
Posted by Jill at 10:05 AM