Wednesday, October 21, 2009

Is this craziness or freedom? Hmmm....



It's Wednesday and the one day a week that I designate to posting here. I have to say that it has been an awesome week. My level of joy has been off the charts. I love times like this. When everything seems energizing and fresh. There is no hint of the cold weather blahs that usually strike me when the days turn cloudy and rainy. My last post really brought me to a higher level of the freedom that my Spirit longs for.

I'm sitting here typing and re-typing my thoughts. I can't seem to find the words to explain what has happened to me since last Wednesday. It's not that I don't know what happened, it's more of a fear of sounding absolutely bonkers. Let me just say that my Spirit manifested itself to me in a way that I have never experienced before. As I lay in bed last Wednesday I was surrounded by a swirling mist of energy and brief flashes of light. I know, it sounds crazy. You know how I know that its not crazy, because I was also filled with an overwhelming sense of peace and serenity. Crazy doesn't feel peaceful and serene. I've felt crazy before. Crazy feels scary and heavy. This isn't being crazy, it's being free.

Was I sleeping? I have no idea. I don't think so, but I guess it doesn't matter. The only thing that matters is that I received a message that night. Not just any message. This was a Divine message to me from me. I saw all the happiness and joy that lives in my heart. It wanted to play. It wants me to play. It wants me to let down all those barriers that seem to creep back up every time I knock them down.

Every time I post an entry here, I am energized and renewed. I am filled with hope and happiness. Even when I have dealt with painful, painful life experiences I always feel hopeful after I blog about it. I received a comment on my last post from a fellow blogger that stressed the importance of having people or things to keep us grounded. I had never thought of that before. My blog definitely keeps me grounded. It is my chance to let my Spirit talk. Besides that eye-opening comment, I also had my little blog mentioned by two other bloggers that I admire greatly. Humility once again reached out and touched me this week. I have been greatly inspired by other bloggers. If I can inspire someone with my thoughts like that, well, then I know that I'm doing something good here.

Thank you all for visiting here. Please feel free to leave a comment and introduce yourself to me if you haven't already. I appreciate this whole blogging community that exists. I am so lucky to have found my voice here.

Just my thoughts.

Oh, one more thing. My joy and playfulness has rubbed off on Mr. Man this week also. He has joined me in a more carefree lifestyle. He is being uncharacteristically playful. He is also telling me what his needs are. Also uncharacteristic behavior for him. I think he feels safe now. He knows that his wants and needs are just as important as mine and the kids. He is stepping out of his comfort zone and liking it. He told me today that he may not be completely free today, but that he will be. How awesome is that?

Are you free today? If not, will you be?

14 comments:

Caroline said...

No you are not crazy! It's such a beautiful thing to experience the divine like you did. Many people never open themselves enough to experience such peace and happiness. I feel much the same about blogging. It grounds me and gives me a sense of purpose.

Stark Raving Zen said...

Nope. Not crazy. Just Divinely inspired. :)

Zeenat{Positive Provocations} said...

I could just come there and hug you Jill. What an exhilarating week you have had. To feel the divine is simply divine :)
You are in the true sense of it FREE! You have let go of all negativity and thats why youre able to feel the way you do. Thankfully your lovely spirit shines through to me and makes me a happy gal too:)
Lots of love and hugs
Zeenat.

Jill said...

Caroline - And I'm so happy that you are blogging to stay grounded also.

Kristy - It helps that you're my sister. Some of it was bound to rub off on me.

Zeenat - A shiny Spirit does feel divine. I can feel your happiness also my friend.

Jay Schryer said...

Definitely not crazy. Like Caroline said, it's truly a blessing and beautiful thing to experience the Divine like you did. We should all be so "crazy". :)

Megan "JoyGirl!" Bord said...

Oh my gosh, I LOVE THAT! How freakin' cool your experience last week sounded. Wow! I've had meditative experiences like that back in the early days, and they're things I cannot forget. When the divine surfaces in our conscious minds, it's truly awesome!

As for Mr. Man becoming more playful and a bit more free, I had to read those words today, Jill. Thank you (see, you never know what part of a post will touch someone!). My boyfriend and I are wondering, jointly I'm sure, if our relationship will work. We love each other to pieces, were brought together divinely (such a great story!), but we're... different. In many, many ways. Think Eva Gabor in Green Acres (that's me) and a cross between the Marlboro Man and a farmer (that's him). I'm a lot of heart & faith, he's a lot of head & logic. Yet we're together for a reason... Why? Not sure. Will it last? Don't know. But reading your post gave me hope that maybe we could learn from each other and eventually set aside our barriers ('cause we're fiercely afraid of committing to anything beyond ourselves, I think). I just have to get him to stay in the country long enough to realize that. Or maybe I have to get ME to stay... while he travels to the Middle East again.
Anyway, thank you, Jill. Always and truly. ( * bow * )

Lori | Jane Be Nimble said...

"If I can inspire someone with my thoughts like that, well, then I know that I'm doing something good here."

Consider yourself tagged! You are certainly doing something not just good, but great! You just inspired me!

Also, a big 10 out of 10 popcorn boxes for surrounding yourself with like-minded bloggers for support. In my book, it's essential.

Great blog here, Jill! Keep going with your gut. Always ask yourself WWJD (What Would Jill Do) and you'll already be where you want to be!
~xo

Christine said...

Such a positive post!!! It even rubbed off on me. :)

Jill said...

Jay - I can definitely live with this kind of "crazy", compared to the kind I used to live in. Thanks.

Megan - I too am all heart & faith and Mr. Man is head & logic. When I met him I lived in the city and he was a farmer wanna be living in a small town not too far from the dairy farm he grew up on. We are still in that small town and he still wishes we could have a little hobby farm. We are not the same people we were when we married. I have become an entirely different person. He still loves me. I still love him.

I believe that we are all with the people we need to be with. Right now you and your Mr. Man are together. You CAN learn from each other.

I would love to hear the story of how you found each other.

Lori - WWJD (What Would Jill Do)!! I love that. I'm happy that you are one of those like-minded bloggers that I am surrounded by.

Christine - I'm glad that I could rub off on you. I would gladly do it again. LOL

Joy said...

Wow, what an amazing experience! I'm glad you shared it, because your joy bounces off the page/computer screen:) And to attain peace and serenity in a household with Littles is a huge blessing at all, not crazy!
This blogging community is such a wonder--you mention your sense of Spirit at you write, and I feel that as I read--there is so much good energy and Spirit and wisdom shared in these writings--on your pages and those of so many others--so much for me to learn from and challenge myself with. You help us to grow even as you grow :)

Jill said...

Thanks Joy. I have goosebumps just from your comment. My Spirit shines a little brighter each time I am able to share it with others.

Stacey said...

I always love the pics you find to go with your posts.

Great writing. I always look forward to your blog.

Susan Blake said...

Hi Jill!
You are inspiring, not crazy! Those moments of a Divine connection are precious! Ask for more!!! You might be delighted with the response. I ask all the time - I get them, differently each time, and each one is more fun than the next! Enjoy it!

There is something fabulously contagious about happy, positive, inspired behavior - which sounds like what you got from your "moment". No surprise that Mr. Man caught it. Keep it going, honey! The more you do, the more you get - what goes around, comes around, and all that stuff, ya know? It's true!!!

Hugs,
suZen

Jill said...

Stacey - I am so glad that you enjoy my blog. Thank you.

SuZen - I think I will ask for more. Connection with the Divine is all that keeps me centered these days. Watching Mr. Man put down his guard has only strengthened our bond.