One year later...

Here we are 1 year later. Again, I celebrate the birth of my amazing 17 year old. Although it has only been 1 year it truly feels like a lifetime has passed. I have changed. Zach has changed. The world has changed.

There is one word that comes to my mind when I think of Zach. Awesome. I am not one to use the word awesome, but today it just keeps filling my head. Zach is awesome. He is a gifted, talented young adult. Full of love and kindness for his family and friends.

I watched him playing chess with Noah the other day and was amazed. A year ago that would not have happened. Today Noah keeps asking Zach when they can go to the MOA together. A year ago Noah would have been too afraid to go anywhere with Zach. I see Ava run downstairs to watch him play his XBox and I am amazed. Awesome.

I hear him playing his guitar. Creating music from his soul which makes him glow. Filling his dark little room with light. He may not know that the light is there, but it is. I walked in one day to ask him a question and all he said was "I am working." Not in a snotty teenage boy tone, but in a "I want to answer you, but I simply can't stop what I'm doing right now" tone. Awesome.

He is not a snotty teenage boy. Hell, he isn't even a teenage boy. He is a wise soul trapped in a teenage boys body. He knows this. He is learning to accept it. He knows he's beyond, beyond his years and this used to make him miserable and crazy. Now he knows that everything is falling into place and he is on his way. Awesome.

So, one year later, I feel gratitude. Gratitude for having such an awesome child in my life. Who has taught me a lot about change. Change is good. Change can bring you into the light. I bask in the light today. And on those days that I can not feel that inner light, I know to find some sunshine and just sit there till I feel the warm hug. It is my hope that Zach always knows where the light is. It is my hope that Zach is able to touch many more people so that they can feel the light also. Awesome.

Just my thoughts.

Jill